December 14, 2010 - Illinois for the holidays

This year, we are spending our winter and our holidays here in Illinois. This is a change from sunny, warm Merida and we miss our home south of the border, especially on days when the thermometer dips below freezing, as it has been doing ALOT lately.

We came up, driving our last time, and arrived here in April. Rented a wonderful apartment in Glenview for 6 months -- Sandy played with pals while Eva worked. We were close to the Glen (formerly the Glenview Naval Air Station which has become parks and open lands, restaurants, shops, movies, homes, and a real community) and so could walk almost every day and enjoy being outside without worrying about where our feet landed (as you have to do in Merida since most sidewalks are far from level or safe!).

Then September arrived and things changed. Eva was anticipating her 50th birthday the middle of the month, and we had discussed various ways to celebrate, but fortunately, had planned none of them since she went into the hospital on the 1st with severe back pain. She had tried various remedies for about a week and when nothing worked, we determined that the pain must be a kidney stone or something equally serious that could not be improved with analgesics, pain meds, anti-inflamatories, Xanax, or a combination of all of these. In the ER, we learned it was not kidney stones, but that was the last of the good news.

Eva was told she was diabetic and a raging diabetic -- blood sugar should be between 90 and 120 and hers was almost 600!! And so the doctors began to focus on this issue and completely forgot her back pain for the moment, but did prescribe dilaudid for the pain. The endocrinologist began shoving insulin in her arms and via IV in megadoses, since we'd told her we would be leaving in November for Mexico and she wanted things under control before we headed off. And four days later, Eva was released with so much information about her new lifestyle and having learned how to shoot up four times a day... in her stomach no less!!

Getting used to news like this is not the easiest, especially when you are still experiencing back pain that ultimately was proven to be stenosis which might have been treated with steroids had she not been diabetic.

But Eva was valiant and we began a low carb diet, more walking, and thinking carefully about what and when we eat. Whether it was the insulin or timing or nothing in particular, a lump in her breast appeared to be growing and had become painful. The endocrinologist said this was not because of mega doses of insulin, so we headed for a mammogram and ultrasound and learned from the radiologist who clearly skipped his finesses class, that she had breast cancer and should get a biopsy before lunch.

So we found a breast doctor, had the biopsy on both sides, since there were lumps on both sides, and learned it WAS cancer, the tumor on the right side might be as large as 5cm, there was lymph node involvement, and the left side was ok. Decisions, decisions. We spoke to EVERYONE including a plastic surgeon about reconstruction, an oncologist about treatment, the breast surgeon and her staff about options, and anyone we knew who had gone through this or heard of someone who had. Finally, Eva decided to do a double mastectomy with axillary node dissection which means a complete removal of both breasts and the removal of the lymph nodes on the right side. This was scheduled for November 17 here in Highland Park hospital.

Surgery went off without a hitch, although it took longer than expected and for some reason, it took much longer to get Eva out of the recovery room than expected. Fortunately, our sweet surgeon saw Marilla and me still sitting in the waiting room hours later and got right on getting Eva to a room. Marilla flew in for the procedure to hold my hand, spell us both, and be a rock. She was awesome!!! A huge help and support and just plain wonderful in every way. Little did we know how thrilled we would be to have her in town....

Surgery was on Wednesday and on Friday Eva came home. (We are staying in the home of a lovely couple who have the most perfect home we can imagine. It is airy and bright and cozy and warm, and filled with fascinating art and more TVs than one could imagine (7 for 2 people!). We have been so very happy to have this gift and live here.) Then on Saturday, the phone rang and it was Sandy's dad calling from Florida to say her mother had fallen and had a heart attack and was scheduled to have a triple bypass the next day since one side of her heart was 90% blocked. Zounds!!

So, Marilla agreed to stay with Eva and Sandy flew down to Palm Beach to check on the old folks who needed her to be there. Mother changed her mind about the surgery and finally, we got her released from the hospital and home to recuperate on Tuesday. She had fallen flat on her head, we think, since she had a lump the size of a baseball over one eye. Her entire head, neck, and arms were purple from bruising. Her legs were both ripped up and sore. She has emphysema and is old enough to make her own decisions, which she has done. Knowing that the surgery could prolong her life if she lived through it and could get off the respirator afterwards, she chose not to have the 4-8 hour procedure at all. And we all chose to respect her wishes and not argue with her or with each other about her decision.

So, Eva is healing well and doing everything she can to do so. She began physical therapy and is not bossing the therapists too much. She will see her oncologist in January to determine the chemo protocol. And radiation has been recommended since there were 4 lymph nodes involved, but she is still thinking about that. My mother is healing well, too. Her lump is only golf ball sized now, and the purple has faded to yellowish. She has oxygen at the house and a visiting nurse who tends to her wounds and takes her blood pressure. She is beginning to boss us from 1500 miles away so we know she is feeling better! Darling, perfect Marilla finally got to go back to Boston after saving us all!!! And Sandy is not so exhausted any more, but her bridge-playing has not been helped by all this commotion!!

And so, we look forward to 2011, knowing it could not hold this many surprises again, and praying that everything and everyone remain as healthy and happy as they are right now! Cheers to you all from frozen Illinois.